
We all experience difficulties or disagreements at one time or another with the
people in our lives. Many times we are able to resolve them on our own with very
little disruption to our daily lives or relationships, but sometimes these
experiences can cause upheaval and emotional distress. Interpersonal Conflicts
tend to lead to the experiences of stress and tension, which may inhibit you as
you attempt to meet the demands of your daily life. There are a few key skills
that can help you to minimize the emotional strain of the conflict in a safe and
healthy way and may potentially help you move towards a resolution. An important
concept in process of conflict resolution is to communicate well and to
understand your own emotional reactions to the experience of the conflict.
Keeping Things in Prospective
When you are feeling bothered by someone's actions
or ideas, try rating the importance of the issue on a scale of 1-10. Reverse the
count of the 1-10 list- 10 should be Life Threatening and 1 should be Trivial.
Use the rating to determine how necessary it is for you to become involved in
the situation.
| Life Threatening - | Someone's health or safety is immediately at risk. |
| Critical - | The solution cannot be ignored without serious damage almost certainly occurring to someone or something. |
| Very serious - | Something pretty bad could happen unless the issue gets handled immediately. |
| Distressing - | Something is going on that seriously violates your values and beliefs but isn't immediately dangerous. |
| Disturbing - | You have a bad feeling about something because it might violate your values and beliefs. |
| Troublesome - | You are bothered by someone's words or behaviors not because they are immediately distressing but because you feel they may have consequences later on. |
| Displeasing - | You don't agree with someone else's choice of words or actions because it is not how you feel you would choose to handle a similar situation. |
| Irritating - | You view the situation as frustrating and unpleasant but it doesn't actually affect your life at all |
| Annoying - | It bothers you that the other person says or does things in a way that you don't care for or that is different from you. |
| Trivial - | The situation may be mildly frustrating but it has no effect on your life and is not about something serious either. Material Adapted from: Stop Anger Now. |
Material Adapted from: Stop Anger Now
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